Amala Paul Instagram – Reposted from @aisootti Remember those people who tell you “It’s because of love”? “Sneham Kondalle?” Trigger warning: Toxic love, Victim blaming. A Malayali woman named Merin was murdered by her husband today in US- on the day she was moving out to another state and another life. He stabbed her 17 times and then ran over her with a car. The murder in itself is spine chilling. But what really froze my very soul were the comments under the news articles on Facebook. It resonated so much with yesterday’s discussions and videos. Snehamulla violence. Toxic love. I will say this again- Whatever it takes you, whatever you do- never return to a place that breaks you, hurts you or erases you. People will tell you ; it’s love, it’s how marriages are, it’s what is expected of you, everyone lives like this, adjust a little, compromise a little, ignore a little. Don’t. They will call you names. They will say you are a whore and insane and arrogant and a sinner. You are not. They will shame you for being strong and feminist and smart and well-read and motivated. Don’t be ashamed one bit. If anyone says they love you and continue doing things that hurt you; it is for eff-sakes NOT love. Always always trust actions over words. Trust the pain you feel over the words you hear. Repeated mistakes are not ‘patti poya’ accidents. If these accidents do not occur in public, to their friends and bosses- it is not accident. Get out. Get out. Get a lawyer who will not Mollywood Male Dialogue you. Call a friend. Call your family. Don’t teach your child Violence is how love is expressed.