Courtney Ford Instagram – My buddy. How are you 8? How did that happen? We celebrated your birthday a few days ago, but I was so focused on making sure your day felt like a celebration despite the circumstances, that I didn’t allow myself time to let things settle. You’re 8 years old. Oh my goodness. My heart. You stopped being a baby years ago, but this feels different. You’ve always been tall, but you’re so tall! You’ve always been smart, but talking with you now is so rich and full, and your understanding of the world has expanded so much, it’s equally beautiful and crushing. I couldn’t sleep last night thinking of something I read when you were a baby: one day you will pick them up for the last time. You won’t realize it’s the last time in the moment, and will simply carry on with your day, unaware of this loss. But tomorrow they’ll grow just a little bit more, and suddenly they’ll have grown too big, too heavy to carry. When was the last time I was able to pick you up? Vancouver? Oh, my heart. I’m going to pick you up today. I don’t know how, but we’ll make it happen. And I’ll breathe in the moment, so it doesn’t pass us by❤️