Today’s game: Guess how old this lady is? The answer is on p.67 of my book Bridge Burning & Other Hobbies. (And no, I cannot explain the bullet holes in the vertical blinds next to my head.)
Thank you and good night!!! Finally managed to do some gigs up in the covid-free Cairns bubble. Thanks for the good times @cairnsperformingarts. Thanks to my audience for coming out and supporting live comedy. And thanks for the great food @caffiend_cairns & @guyalacafe. I’d almost forgotten what a sweet SWEET job I have! 😻x #gladgame #staycovidfreepleasecairns
Hey everyone! Turns out 488 Rules for Life wasn’t enough. I have a special little companion volume coming out, called More Rules for Life. It’s a book for true rule enthusiasts, for people who believe that you should always take the lettuce off the sandwich before you toast it. And other serious stuff like that.
For all you lovely people asking about my top and lipstick. Top is from @review_australia but it’s had the “young persons ruffle collar” folded in and stitched down. Nyyyude lip is a Mac lip pencil – (oak) plus @meccacosmetica own brand lip gloss (nude) Hashtag not paid to say it or wear it so you can trust me! 😻x
Great to be back on HYBPA sitting next to Marty, the naughtiest boy in the class. Great fun tonight with Alex, Ed and Sam with Chrissie doing a brilliant job hosting. Massive spoiler alert – Pretty sure I don’t win.
Serious snack researchers or part time workers at the Clinique counter? New Junkees ep out today with some of the most truly disgusting chips I’ve ever tasted. You can also join us live in “The Lab” on the 1st of August as part of the @melbournepodcastfestival 😻x #norustling
So this is me not performing at the Gold Coast this weekend. Sorry everyone, government says no. Sad face. We have rescheduled the shows for the 6th & 7th of November. Please keep your tix and come along then. Fingers crossed face 🤞🤞Kitty x
Oooh it’s a big Junkees podcast today – new segment – Converting The Masses plus we expose Doritos for ripping off our blind taste test idea AND we get classy with a Chuppa Chup beverage “on aice with a slaice of laime” if you don’t maind! Cheers. X
Had such a good time on Monday – great to be back in the studio with my favourite peeps and a real live audience too! (hashtag letsvaccinate – let’s keep the arts alive and the theatres and venues open!) My lovely stripey top is from Zara for those of you asking. HYBPA repeated on Sundays now or catch-up on tenplay. 😻x
Alex is back, Mick’s back, Ed’s on and even Sam bothered to turn up. We’re on right now! (And repeated on Fridays) 😻x
8.40 on ten – it’s top shelf stuff on HYBPA tonight – Ed, Sam, Luke and my favourite funny lady, Anne Eddo Edmonds. Spoiler alert, I think I walk away with a new boyfriend…?
Great lineup on HYBPA right now! V funny work from Marty, Glenn and Ed but Lady Eddo @anne_edmonds_ gets my vote for best on ground. #pissfunny
Hashtag hack time! As its orange season, I’m posting this life changing way to cut up an orange (from my book 488 Rules For Life.) This method means you avoid scurvy AND all of the pith. Illustration by Tohby Riddle. Props to @ness_bads for reminding me that audio book listeners didn’t see this piece of wisdom. 😻x
Today on The Junkees podcast, it’s a festival of chocolate biscuit tasting, rowntree randoms (spoiler alert – just DON’T get some) and a very noisy sweet sweet memory jogger – it’s popping candy! Get on board.
This week on The Junkees we try a bunch of stuff, cracker chips (meh) white Kit Kat (meh) and Gaytime popcorn – just get some! It’s sickly but good. Also Whitaker’s Hokey Pokey chocolate scores two thumbs up. Munchalong with us in lockdown. (Always remove mask before eating) xx
Lockdown can’t stop The Junkees – it only makes us stronger (and possibly fatter) Today we put the breakaway up against the Kit Kat – discover a “chocolate virus” in the party faves – plus some blind tests and a whole lot of blather and lame research. Get. On. Board!
Latest ep of The Junkees out today featuring the world’s most resistible biscuits. Plus Dave tries to burn my face off with FIRE flavoured chips. And do you remember the Snifter? Cos it’s back! Thankyou New Zealand.
It’s a festival of sherbert today on The Junkees plus one of the greatest finds ever in blind taste test chips (spoiler – it’s not Dave’s dumb lentil chips it’s the other ones) and a sweet SWEET musky memory jogger. Get on board!
New episode of The Junkees out today. Milkos & Redsticks (Dave’s new improved name for the “Red Ripper”) Plus two of the worst blind test chips ever. Pond scum and Poo flavours. Blergh. 🤢
Well I trust ALL of Melbourne will be watching tonight – after all – we’ve got nowhere else to be but in a queue to get tested or vaccinated! Everyone else is welcome to watch too obviously. 😻x
Today on The Junkees our national pride is at stake with Tim Tams vs Penguins and then we chip ourselves stupid thanks to @bouldercanyon. Get on board and snack your way through lockdown #wellbalancedburn
We’re back to help you munch your way through lockdown. This week, Tyrrells mature cheddar & chive chips (spoiler alert, just get some) Toobs are back (but more like Rings) and we take a trip to New Zealand via the sugar train, get on board bro! 😻x
Recorded remotely in lockdown, today’s ep Is one of my faves! McVities Digestives, Hobnobs, Chocolate Wheatens, a banana rematch and so much lame research you’ll think I’ve become a Professor at Sweet & Salty University. Get on board. Chew chew!!
Spoiler alert: My blind test chip for Dave on today’s ep of The Junkees podcast is ROAST GOOSE!! Winner winner roast goose dinner. Just get some.
