Scott Clifton Instagram – True story: I don’t wear shorts. Never have. Unless I’m working out or swimming (or on set in costume), I’ve never liked the look, feel, or frankly, the idea of trousers that just stop existing halfway down my leg. It’s weird, okay?
I also hate feeling hot. I’d sooner freeze to death than endure the crippling agony of that first bead of sweat coalescing on my skin. (Surely you see the paradox here?)
Given the last few weeks of sweltering California weather—basically the hottest summer on record—something had to give. So I cast aside both my pride and my neuroses, trudged ever-bravely into a Val Surf, and walked away with two—TWO!—brand new pairs of shorts. A whole new Me.
Cut to: the next day, Ford and I decide to go ride our bicycles at the park. Great opportunity to debut my pasty Scottish calves. As I’m unloading the bikes from the back of my 4Runner, I realize my leg has been resting on the scalding hot tailpipe for several nanoseconds too long, leaving me with an incredibly painful, soot-black crescent tattoo.
That was over a week ago and it’s been healing nicely, but the moral of the story? Y’all short-wearing SOB’s take for granted the long-developed instinct to constantly protect your legs. This shit comes with a learning curve.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk. | Posted on 22/Sep/2022 01:21:35
