Esther Perel Instagram – When I was raising my two boys, I relied heavily on my friendships with older women who knew the ins and outs of what it took to be a mother in New York City. I was a foreigner without any family close by in a city where so many parents feel as if they have to go at it alone. And there was another factor, too. My relationship with my own mother was full of love but it was also full of ambivalence. I feared that if I called her with my parenting questions, she’d criticize me from across the ocean, in Belgium. I knew that I needed motherly mentorship beyond the perspective she could give me. The cliché is true: it takes a village to raise a child. But it also takes a village to raise a parent. And so it was. My boys were raised by a host of family friends, chosen aunts and uncles. Seven families, from eight different countries of origin, morphed into a vibrant community. We were in it together, and it was a salve to the impinging loneliness one can feel as a parent. Somehow my boys are now in their mid-late twenties. I currently have five friends who are twenty-five years younger than me who all have become mothers over the last decade. We’ve brought them into the fold. Babies at dinner parties, kids at adult gatherings who fall asleep on a pillow. I’ve relished talking to my young friends about pregnancy and motherhood, fielding their phone calls, meeting their little ones, and watching them grow. I love a front row seat with backstage experience. I asked one of these friends, @erinallweiss if she could share a few thoughts with me about our dynamic for Mother’s Day: “As I reflect on our intergenerational friendship and motherhood, what I appreciate most is the perspective of time. You get to look back, reflect on your parenting experience, and share lessons that are invaluable for what I’m going through right now; and I see in you the benefits of mothering in a way that is authentic to who I am and what I value.” On this Mother’s Day, I’d love to hear about the motherly figures in your life who helped raise you, or are helping you raise your kids. I’d love to hear your stories of intergenerational friendship. I’ll look for yours in the comments.