Phoebe Robinson Instagram – #ThotNaysh! HOW IS SEPTEMBER OVER? Clearly, she wasn’t here for us. Like she really was that girl who came to our vision board party early while we’re arranging magazines, scissors, & glue, had the signature drink, then bounced to another party full of peen. RUDE! But I get it cuz who has time for risking paper cuts when you want someone up in dem guts? HALP! Point is, ppl move on like today’s honoree, who’s ending her tour this wkend. 🥹. Sad, but let’s raise a glass to the singer, fashion/beauty icon, businesswoman, & philanthropist, who had us giving Reynolds Wrap Aluminum Foil Fashion Week in our silver lewks at her concerts, helped us identify the assholes of the world by who couldn’t STFU during the #MuteChallenge, & turned us all into Colum-heauxes aka PIs in Shein trenchcoats as we asked WHERE. ARE. THE. VISUALS? I’m talking about @beyonce. ⠀ Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter is THE smoke show! Why? Cuz she’s the go-to compliment non-black ppl use for Black women. Once, a French lady said I look like Beyoncé. To quote Adele: “WHEN? WHERE? NAUR!” & then I bought the ring Frenchie was trying to sell. Just saying, if she said I look like Stacey Dash, I would’ve fromaged my ass outta there. That’s the power of Beyoncé! She helps a bitch get commish! ⠀ Frfr, B is 🔥! Her boobs are glorious Burning Man sand dunes I’d loved to be trapped at, take ayahuasca, & talk about my dreams. Her flawless face makes the Mona Lisa look like expired low fat Chobani yogurt. But it’s not just lewks, y’all! ⠀ Her résumé: Destiny’s Child (duh!), B has sold over 200 million albums worldwide, won 32 Grammys, & is the first solo act to have their first 7 albums debut #1 in the US. She’s a major philanthropist w/her Bey Good initiative. And much like The Fast & the Furious’s Dom Toretto, Bey is all about family from her close bond w/her parents to letting Blue shine on the #Renaissance tour! ⠀ Congrats, Beyoncé, on being you. If Blue needs an understudy, lemme know & I’ll pack my Icy/Hot & come thru. Welcome to the #ThirstyThursday Hall of Fame! ⠀ P.S. It’s mah birthday! The greatest gift you could get is going to my #MessyAF stand-up tour. Click da link in da bio for tix! #Beyonce