Law and Order: Out of Order. A play. I wrote it. “Hello! Can I take your order?” “Hello! I’d like to order the special: Law and Order.” “I’m so sorry sir we’ve run out of order. Would you like to order Law and Order sans order? “Ok, yes, I’ll order just the Law then. Hold the order.” “Well we’re out of order. So.” “Right like I said, I’m not ordering the order.” “Well when you ordered you said ‘hold the order’ so I thought you may have mistakenly heard me order you to not order the order thinking there actually was order.” “……….I’ll just have the hot dog.” “Order up!” The end! Haha! I’m raising financing right now. LMK if you want to invest. It’s a $50 million budget and we’ll be replacing Phantom in March. See you soon Broadway. ⭐️
“Hey Meg let’s take a selfie to capture this amazingly chill moment at the end of a super relaxing and cheap day without any kids poop in the stroller and absolutely zero tears, no tears at all, never once did kids cry because they only had a $40 buzz lightyear bubble thing instead of a $40 woody bubble thing and we’re just so happy and thankful that we’re here.”
Almost my favorite time of year again. Pumpkins and basketball. What better way to commemorate the return of fall but with this photographic masterpiece. What a photo. What a time. What a shirt. Bedsides the clipart thrift-store vision of a what a basketball court looks like, my favorite detail has gotta be the stain just north of the belly button. What exactly is that stain? Poptart filling? Brisk Iced Tea? Bagel Bite sauce? We’ll never know. But I‘ll tell you what – this kid doesn’t care. Light as a feather, this king. Yes chef. He’s floatin’ some closed-mouth-smile cockiness because he just absolutely decimated the eyes out of a pumpkin with a $2 pick, and nothing is stopping him now, or ever.
Merry Christmas from the Cotts! Been up since 3:30 AM! Kids are the best (worst)!
Cott boys crushing the Kingdom.
You heard it here first. The “Hairspray/Chicago” mashup-sequel you never knew you wanted, BUT also what you’ve never needed. Efron was busy – so here I am folks. A way less ripped, pasty, midwestern take on Link Larkin. It’s 10 years later. Tracie has left him. He finds himself in a dumpster with nowhere to turn. UNTIL Mama Morton rescues him. Gives him a new look on life. A new lease. Perhaps even – a new good morning…Welcome to the 70s guys. You can’t stop the beat on this one. Because at the end of the day, without love, you will hear the bells. And they’ll be glorious. Timeless. To me. It takes two. Nicest kids in town. Run and tell that. Cell block tango. JK. I’m on @theequalizercbs with @queenlatifah this Sunday, 3/19 at 8/7c on @cbstv. It’s a good one.
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
3 month lyfe dump #Range
2023. Two thousand twenty three. 2000 23. Two 1000’s Michael Jordan = this year. What a ride. What an experience. What. A. Voyage. This is a super small, really subtle observation, but I feel there is a massive void for instagram “year in review” collages – so I am now going to bless your timeline with my own – through my 2023 beard journey. It was truly beyond. I started the year out strong in photo #1 – dirty trucker/hipster/chic with a hint of “I trimmed yesterday, but still doesn’t smell that great.” In photo #2 – we then REALLY embraced the trucker/showerless/Leo-in-Revenant-vibe. (Hall of fame beard there don’t @ me) Photo #3: I’ve always wanted to play the bad guy in a Disney teen skateboarding flick. Maybe even a Tony Hawk Pro Skater player option? Whatever it is – this dude listens to Nickelback only and absolutely crushes big gulps. Photo #4 – just me – but AI. (It doesn’t have anything to do with beard journey but still reveals amazing things about my 2023 experience that you absolutely must see #2023 #Life #AI #ItsMeCorey) Photo #5 is a super artsy, super silly, super free spirited, super unedited, super candid, just super super super spur of the moment, live in the moment, no filter, just – me – clean shaven. Idk. A little bit Alexis. #Real #BeReal #Reality #Realness #iPhone #ShotOniPhone #SubscribeToMyYoutubeChannel #AndMyPodcast Photo #6 – moos-tash. Much. Tache. Stash. Vibing. Photo #7 – smashing an Arby’s beef and cheddar last week. Please feel free to comment/subscribe/message/podcast/cameo/voicememo/smash-the-like-button how my 2023 helped you navigate your own experience. Love. HNY. idk.
Can’t believe I get to do these gigs for my job. What a dream performing this past weekend with the @sandiegosymphony at @theshellsd with the insanely talented @mcclurerob @mikaelabennett_ and @el.stans. On a personal note – we are packing up everything and moving to San Diego. JK but my Zillow searches would beg to differ. It was my first time there and the hype is real. Donuts, tacos, the weather, donuts, and tacos. True paradise. Side note: the last clip @mcclurerob captured “Lonely Town” during sound check while an actual naval ship sailed past *as I was singing about leaving a naval ship to explore a town I’ve never been to.* God is good. @garypaynephotography
Can’t believe I get to do these gigs for my job. What a dream performing this past weekend with the @sandiegosymphony at @theshellsd with the insanely talented @mcclurerob @mikaelabennett_ and @el.stans. On a personal note – we are packing up everything and moving to San Diego. JK but my Zillow searches would beg to differ. It was my first time there and the hype is real. Donuts, tacos, the weather, donuts, and tacos. True paradise. Side note: the last clip @mcclurerob captured “Lonely Town” during sound check while an actual naval ship sailed past *as I was singing about leaving a naval ship to explore a town I’ve never been to.* God is good. @garypaynephotography
Can’t believe I get to do these gigs for my job. What a dream performing this past weekend with the @sandiegosymphony at @theshellsd with the insanely talented @mcclurerob @mikaelabennett_ and @el.stans. On a personal note – we are packing up everything and moving to San Diego. JK but my Zillow searches would beg to differ. It was my first time there and the hype is real. Donuts, tacos, the weather, donuts, and tacos. True paradise. Side note: the last clip @mcclurerob captured “Lonely Town” during sound check while an actual naval ship sailed past *as I was singing about leaving a naval ship to explore a town I’ve never been to.* God is good. @garypaynephotography
Can’t believe I get to do these gigs for my job. What a dream performing this past weekend with the @sandiegosymphony at @theshellsd with the insanely talented @mcclurerob @mikaelabennett_ and @el.stans. On a personal note – we are packing up everything and moving to San Diego. JK but my Zillow searches would beg to differ. It was my first time there and the hype is real. Donuts, tacos, the weather, donuts, and tacos. True paradise. Side note: the last clip @mcclurerob captured “Lonely Town” during sound check while an actual naval ship sailed past *as I was singing about leaving a naval ship to explore a town I’ve never been to.* God is good. @garypaynephotography
Can’t believe I get to do these gigs for my job. What a dream performing this past weekend with the @sandiegosymphony at @theshellsd with the insanely talented @mcclurerob @mikaelabennett_ and @el.stans. On a personal note – we are packing up everything and moving to San Diego. JK but my Zillow searches would beg to differ. It was my first time there and the hype is real. Donuts, tacos, the weather, donuts, and tacos. True paradise. Side note: the last clip @mcclurerob captured “Lonely Town” during sound check while an actual naval ship sailed past *as I was singing about leaving a naval ship to explore a town I’ve never been to.* God is good. @garypaynephotography
Wrapping up some @theequalizercbs.
$12 Target shades for the win.
An amazing evening celebrating opening night of @dannyandthedeepnyc. Congrats to @christopher__abbott and @plazadeaubrey on incredibly powerful performances. A must see.
