Jo De La Rosa Instagram – Not everyone wants to have kids right after marriage. Second newflash. If you gain 20 pounds in your first year of marriage, it doesn’t mean you’re pregnant – it can mean you’re happy and enjoying life.
This last year has been the happiest of my life after marriage but it’s also been the most challenging. Challenging to shut out the noise of “why we aren’t trying yet.” Challenging to unsee comments saying “it’s definitely a pregnancy glow” or “she’s totally pregnant.”
I think it’s wild we live in a world where there are so many expectations of what “the next step” should be after marriage. There’s an expectation to get to the next thing and even when you share you’re not sure what that is yet, people answer with “you should freeze your eggs” and then it becomes a topic of age when that’s not the not the spirit women should feel deciding whether they want to bring a child into this world.
I think after you marry the love of your life and before you decide if having a family is right for you, we should be allowed a middle adventure – the in-between phase – where you’re enjoying your first years of marriage but you’re still on a journey discovering what you want for your life with your partner.
I admire women who knew from the beginning they always wanted to be a mom. Some of us came from broken homes and the idea of stability is foreign to us – kids and marriage weren’t something we had the luxury of dreaming of since we were little girls.
Whatever your story is, I think women should be allowed to celebrate every stage of life and that includes the in-between stages where “I’m not sure yet” is your answer.
Wherever you are if your in-between journey, know you aren’t alone and “I don’t know yet” is a perfectly ok answer and a truthful place to be.
It’s the place I’m at as we contemplate whether we want to have kids at all and if that’s right for our family.
We should be allowed joy in our journey and everything that comes with the in-between so stay true to you and as hard as it is, do your best to shut out the noise 💜 | Posted on 25/May/2023 06:53:15
