Madisson Hausburg Instagram – Update time! 👇 PAL (pregnancy after loss) is a whirlwind. I haven’t talked about it much publicly because after a year and a half of grueling infertility, I often feel guilty for expressing anything but gratefulness when it comes to pregnancy. The truth is, I AM incredibly grateful AND I am anxious and terrified at times. I thought the further along I got, the easier it would be. But, turns out it’s quite the opposite. As we get closer and closer to babygirl’s due date, I am acutely aware of every single movement. I breathe a sigh of relief with each kick and twirl. While most days are good days, I still wake each morning in fear and clutch my stomach until I feel her move. After losing Elliot at full term, I know that a healthy pregnancy doesn’t always equal a living baby in the end and I will not be fully relieved until our girl is in my arms safe and sound. I think it’s important to recognize that PAL is an incredibly complicated journey filled with duality. I acknowledge that it is a huge privilege and a blessing to be able to be pregnant again, and I also acknowledge how much my loss has vastly changed what pregnancy looks like for me. That being said, I am SOOOOOO attached and obsessed and in love with this baby girl inside me!!! I am so happy to be her mama and I will continue doing my best and being the best mama I can be to both of my babies! 💕💕💕