Our Lady J Instagram – Every year on this day, couples flaunt their vulgar heterosexuality right in front of my face as if I’m not even there. The sight of so many long-stemmed roses makes my stomach turn, knowing that I have to live in a world that encourages this kind of unnatural behavior. I couldn’t sleep at all last night, thinking about the vanilla sex positions these couples must bore themselves with while downing glasses of Prosecco and feeding each other chocolate-covered strawberries. The thought that procreation occurs as a result of this sickness is enough to send me to the hospital. I consider myself to be a fairly close-minded person, a quality that took years of hardening and bitchery to develop. But as time goes by, I find it harder and harder to tell straight folks to fuck off to their faces. I’m not proud of it, but I just don’t have the same passion I used to have for calling people out on their delusions. Sadly, I’ve been polite and nice to every couple I’ve come across today. Feeling pretty lost about it all, as you can imagine, but I’m grateful for your support. You all really keep me going. #valentinesday #satire