Kelsey Edwards Instagram – how cool is it that you probably don’t even know some of your best friends yet 🥹
i really struggled to find solid friends in my early 20s—i always thought i’d found “the one,” my ride or die bestie, only to be met with confusion, heartbreak & feelings of unworthiness when i was replaced or ghosted over and over again.
it was such a painful experience and it kept happening, so i was forced to turn inward and ask WHY i was attracting that specific experience into my reality.
our reality is the reflection of our beliefs, so something about my beliefs was calling that same type of friendship in.
it wasn’t until i did some deep soul-searching (always am, tbh 🙃) that i realized 1. i had a belief that people do not stick around (my dad left as a teenager therefore i believed that everyone important to me will inevitably leave) and 2. “the one” that i was searching for was really myself.
i had developed patterns of co-dependency where i thought my value would come from a friendship. if i was someone’s best friend, i had value.
only when i started to be my own best friend first did i change the type of friends i was attracting into my life. when i started to wholly love myself and put my needs first, i started to attract mature, communicative friends who did the same.
now i look at my circle of ride-or-die best friends & it’s filled with women who are brave and inspiring.
women who love themselves, communicate needs & set boundaries, but also find a compromise when those needs/boundaries conflict with someone else’s whom they love.
@thejessicamar & i had a perfect example of this today – we both had different needs in a situation that conflicted. but we were able to be open & communicative about it & find a solution that felt good for both of us.
these types of friends could not have materialized into my reality if i wasn’t putting it out there first.. i had to get good with ME first & stop giving MY power away before i could attract that kind of friend back into my reality.
if you’re struggling to find good friends, ask yourself the hard questions.. because good friendships start with you. 👯♀️
#friends #friendships #growth #growthmindset #authentic | Posted on 26/Jun/2024 10:08:28
