Alexis Nikole Nelson Instagram – moments of joy I’ve been lucky enough to have just before and during tragedies.
My mom lost her partner, John (who with my mom happily, lovingly, and enthusiastically showed up for me and my sister for everything. Plays, comedy shows, lectures, good days, less than good days…)
Having someone disappear without warning was like a plane losing a window, pressure falling, oxygen escaping, everything cold and frantic. And I’m admittedly awful when it comes to talking about death, and still worry about if I’ve been showing up for my mom to the best of my ability… but if there’s one thing I know how to do, it’s be there with the people I love, with a warm beverage, and a heart ready to help carry their pain. But I still feel so helpless watching someone who deserves the world experience such profound loss.
36 hours later after we lost John, my dad was rushed to the hospital. It was one of those moments where you can only throw your head back and laugh.
and then cry.
My dad, after hours of bedside chats and hand squeezing has thankfully stabilized. but he left the hospital with a cancer diagnosis that he didn’t have when he entered.
It’s been a hard season.
And yet there have been moments of holding joy, community, light, and togetherness during it all. It’s made me realize again and again and again and again how lucky I am to have a family, chosen and blood, that is ready to catch me softly when I fall. I’m thankful for my mom’s amazing friends, and her ability to bring great people together. I’m thankful for so many of you, for sweet little phone distractions and patience as I try to put the parts of my heart and mind back on the shelf from which they were tossed.
There is so much grief in this life. But there is also so much love. They may even be two sides of the same coin 🩷
So here, have some of the lightness (and a couple real dissociative moments 😅) that got me through the darkness. Maybe it’ll bring a little glow to you, too. | Posted on 07/Mar/2025 09:03:14
