Pavithra Lakshmi Instagram – Ohhh what a last week of September !!
LONG READ AHEAD – GRATITUDE TO YOU ALL❤️
AND A LONG OVERDUE OF SELF CREDIT
I was always called “strong”, but i never believed myself to be, never been able to give myself credit, always felt i was not sufficient enough, had a lot of self doubt. I always self sabotaged for people important to me.
But the last one year, and how i crossed darkness (which i still dont know how) made ME gain so much respect for MYSELF, finally look at myself with an exclamation mark.
When life hit me from all sides, i was scared if it was all over for me.
I was scared if I’d end up never being able to do what I love as a gift of something that I thought was eternal.
When I was left alone in an almost dying, and blamed on my mental health.
When cry for help was tagged crazy.
When what drained me till my last drop called me drainer
When a homework called me homeless
When the “cause” of my condition called me complicated
I clearly thought it was all over for me.
Well quiet honestly
But thanks to my Adamancy – i didnt give up.
I took myself up, it wasn’t easy.
I take one step forward, i slipped back 10
I was broken, sick, penny-less, deceived and dejectedi was in pain physically and mentally
I am still not completely fine, not even half way there. But,
From being terribly sick and not being able to walk a 100 meter distance without pain from all my muscles radiating and swelling,
To doing a ten days 10 different cities,
From being both unable to eat any favorite food, or not go a couple of hours without the proper food, From being every sip of water to every bite of being monitored
To running with mind focused on work not so sure about the food.
To not being able to sleep for a 2 hour stretch for 8 months to running 10 days dreaming of when I can sleep.
Not liking myself to adoring myself.
When, people who i shared my story, history, family fun, food, to even blood left me sinking.
To the people i only knew as profile names and Display pictures, stood by me and believed in me.
Thank you, thank you all sooooo much.
And for few souls, who didnt really have to stay, but stayed.
I am grateful. Gratitude is all i have. | Posted on 30/Sep/2025 16:52:52
