Perri Lauren Instagram – Contemplating why I can’t stay off the phone on Shabbos. Telling you because I believe in transparency and I try my hardest not to be a hypocrit but, even after months, I can not resist looking. I was even looking at my phone when I told my fiance I couldn’t turn on the sound system for him and henceforth ruined my potential moment of yoga that turned into a moment of self pity.
I try to remember that it’s not about being perfect, but I can’t help but beat myself up when my will power gets the best of me.
I know it’s a process. I know it’s a process. I know it’s a process.
I’m sure that’s not the only thing I did this weekend. There are so many things you’re not encouraged to do on Shabbos (like carry anything in your hands or pockets outside your home. Ie. Keys) and I did that too, but why can’t I get past that Hashem doesn’t need perfection, just effort? Maybe it’s because I don’t use enough of my will and that makes me feel guilty because I know and Hashem knows.
What is this vessel for if not to live as Hashem has commanded us? That’s what makes me feel most whole and fulfilled. I want to do better and there is still so much to learn and so far to go. | Posted on 26/Nov/2023 04:19:45
