Esther Perel Instagram – “How do you know if a relationship is worth saving?” is one of the most commonly asked questions I receive. Ambivalence exists in every relational configuration, but we put a lot of pressure on romantic love, in particular, to rise above it. It is an uncomfortable feeling — heavy with contradictions, it makes us doubt our feelings and choices. This discomfort makes us crave a definitive answer. So we force ourselves one way or the other. We learn that romantic love is supposed to flood us with certainty and thus there is no room for ambivalence. But ambivalence is as intrinsic to relationships as love itself. Of course there are situations in which we need to definitively decide to stay or go. But there are just as many, if not more, situations in which our ability to hold our ambivalence is a sign that we understand and accept the complexities of life. ‍ For more on this topic and much more, visit the link in my bio for the full episode of my conversation with On Purpose hosted by @jayshetty.