Amanda Palmer Instagram – There’s storms a-raging, but I’m starting to sense the tingle of being more at peace than I have in over fifteen years.
The autumn hope in the air, the art I am finishing, the strength I am gathering, the friends who are assembling to support me and the kiddo as we move. It used to be so much about the opinions of the outside; that’s changed. It’s more the safe feeling I get when the good people in my life – who have always had the least interest in bullshit and the most in integrity – show up in my life with full force.
Yesterday we filmed a project that’s been overdue for five years and got delayed due to covid and other drama.
Today I work on edit of another delayed project. My concert on Tuesday was one of the best I’ve ever played. My heart is gathering itself back together. And Ash and I are settling into a new home.
I felt so very alone and disoriented for those three years overseas. So many people in New York and Boston have told me lately that my internet memoirs of those years helped them. I imagine I’ll write them all down someday, when it’s the right time, including all the things I just couldn’t articulate.
I still feel so homesick sometimes – and so does Ash. I miss the values of the people there, the emphasis on community, the civility. It changed me in ways I was ready to be changed.
But I am, also, finally starting to feel at home again, at home in my own skin, my new skin, my true self skin. It’s taken me so long to understand who I am – versus who I have wanted people to see – and so much about how the darker sides of the world work. I feel like a drowning person finally getting to the surface to gulp air. Not yet breathing steadily, but completely out of the undertow. Not yet on dry land, but on the raft. I see lighthouses everywhere.
I love you. Good morning.
I’m going to work on the monthly newsletter for the patrons and publish it today or tomorrow. The support and community over there has also been a real blessing lately, and many people are also seeming fritzy. Come on over; the Patreon – now over 20,000 – is now free to join. You can upgrade to paid but you never have to in order to get the posts. It’s nice. ♥️🙏 | Posted on 30/Aug/2024 17:35:50
