Happy two month birthday, Elliot Angel Soto 🕊
Two months ago, at the very end of my healthy and uneventful pregnancy, I noticed my baby stopped moving. Ish took me to the hospital and there was no heartbeat. I’ve never heard anything more deafening than the lack of a heartbeat on an ultrasound at 9 months pregnant. My whole world collapsed in that moment. I was immediately induced for labor. I spent two days in labor with my baby’s lifeless body inside me. I heard babies crying and families cheering next door, all while I was experiencing so much pain physically and emotionally. I gave birth to baby Eli at 2:09am on Sunday, December 12th. It was immediately evident to the doctors how Elliot had died. His cord was tied in a true knot and was wrapped around his neck twice. These were the worst moments of my life…
But what followed was simply magical. The nurse handed me the most beautiful boy in the world. He was absolutely perfect. I can’t even begin to describe the amount of pure love and pride I felt with my baby. Ish and I created such an incredible little human, and I finally got to meet him. I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world!! I would do absolutely anything to have you in my arms again, Tiny 🤍
It’s extremely bittersweet revisiting those days at the hospital. I haven’t even begun to unpack the trauma and the weight that they carry. The past two months feel like a blur. The grief is all-consuming. I simply don’t know how to move forward without my baby, yet somehow the time still passes and I’m still here…just surviving. I could not do it without my incredible husband, my sisters, my parents, my friends, and especially all the fellow loss moms I have met along the way. I am so so thankful to have this platform to share Elliot with ALL of you. The outpouring of love has been such a light for me in these darkest of days. So, THANK YOU 🙏
I love you, I love you, I love you, baby Angel 👼🏻
Elliot’s mom and dad 💗
Jamaica and @sandalsresorts will always have a very special place in my heart. This is where we conceived our son just over a year ago. I will forever cherish the memories we have made here. We always talked about making this trip again and bringing our baby boy with us. I hate that you’re not here as planned little one, but I’m happy to be in a place where I can connect with you.
As always, I miss you so much baby Elliot. I love you more than anything! Whether you are here or not, you are our whole world and always will be. 💞
Elliot’s mom and dad 💗
Jamaica and @sandalsresorts will always have a very special place in my heart. This is where we conceived our son just over a year ago. I will forever cherish the memories we have made here. We always talked about making this trip again and bringing our baby boy with us. I hate that you’re not here as planned little one, but I’m happy to be in a place where I can connect with you.
As always, I miss you so much baby Elliot. I love you more than anything! Whether you are here or not, you are our whole world and always will be. 💞
2/22/22 🎂 Today I turn 28 years old. I look back on the past year and it was without a doubt the best and worst year of my life. I traveled to new countries with friends, married the love of my life, grew an entire baby, gave birth, and became a bereaved mother all at 27 years old. I have grown so much this year, much more than anyone should ever have to…but here I am. I hope 28 will be gentler. 🤍
As today marks Elliot’s three month birthday, I want to share a life update with everyone. After getting the green light from the doctor this week, Ish and I have decided to try conceiving again. Am I ready? No, I am utterly terrified. After Elliot’s death, I don’t think I will ever be truly emotionally ready to be pregnant again. But I have this deep need to be that I can’t explain.
It is extremely difficult navigating motherhood without your baby. Kissing Elliot’s cold, hard urn every night is a stark contrast to kissing the soft, warm cheeks of my baby boy. There’s a hole in my heart that will never be healed, but I hold hope that motherhood won’t always look like this for me 🧸💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
10.21.21 ❤️ My wedding was literally a dream. I was 7 months pregnant with Elliot and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. I am so grateful for all the incredible people and vendors who made this day possible.
Event planner: @oroeventco
Flowers: @tailoredtwig
Venue: @misionlagoestate
Rentals: @gabroeventservices
Photography: @paigestellutophoto
Videography: @onlywavetv
Accommodations: @hardrocktampa
Cake: @elisespieces22
Hair: @cheyanne_hair
Make up: @melissa_colletteartistry
Wedding dress: @stefanienaylor
Bridesmaids dresses: @mumuweddings
Catering: @cblundys
Music: @dj_juicy_one & @candi_theviolinist
Photo booth: @posyexchange
Neons: @novachrome_design_studio
And a special shout-out to all our family and friends and SK film crew who joined us on this special day! Watch it all begin to unfold tonight on Siesta Key at 9pm💕
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
This day was absolutely perfect. I was 20 weeks pregnant with Elliot and my friends surprised me with a baby/bridal shower. I will never forget this day and how truly happy I was making memories with baby E in my tummy. So many people love you, Tiny! 🧸🤍
Tonight, on Siesta Key, @ishsoto1 and I will begin telling our story. 9/8c on @mtv
🤍 Happy six month wedding anniversary to the love of my life! 🤍
Our marriage has been tested with the greatest test life can give you—the loss of a child. Yet, our love only becomes stronger with every day that passes. You have never offered me anything less than unwavering love and support through absolutely everything. The way you love our son makes me love you more than I ever thought possible. The relationship you have developed, and continue to develop, with Elliot is so beautiful to witness. You inspire me to push forward every single day. You are my light in the darkest of days. You are the greatest husband and father in the world. I wouldn’t want to spend forever with anyone else. I LOVE YOU @ishsoto1 🌹
I am so thankful for this season of Siesta Key. Capturing my pregnancy and little Elliot’s journey on camera is something I will forever cherish. And I’m so grateful these girls were there every step of the way. Love you all! 🕊🤍
PS Thank you for the most beautiful sunset, my baby boy!
