Just popping in go say hello!!!! I haven’t posted since my Birthday a month ago. Boy, time flies and what a month it’s been! I’ve been very focused on keeping my head up and my eyes and ears open. Also, not focusing on what I want to post on social media helps me figure out what’s going on inside my mind and soul. I’m curious, what’s been on your mind latley? I’m wondering if there is a collective consciousness happening and I’m also just interested in talking to you all about what’s going on in inside your head these days. Let’s get some conversation happening in the comments! ⬇️ I’ll start, I’ve been very focused on my Jewish Faith and my connection to Hashem and what it means to follow the laws and commandments of the Torah the best I can. Even though yesterday I ate non Kosher desserts. I thought, what’s going to happen to me? But then I couldn’t get out of bed today so I’m learning that my soul doesn’t want to disobey the Torah and doing so effects me emotionally and mentally. Okay, your turn. I’m looking forward to this!!
Roday is my 37th birthday. It’s been a much better year and time than 34, 35 and 36. The past few years have been a mental, spiritual and existential struggle from depression and a diagnosis of schitzo-effectice disorder, 2 hospitalizations, 1 benzo withdawrl and 1 Out-Patient program, a spiritual and existential crisis that lead to 2 years of not leaving my bed or the couch or the house, for that matter, and shutting everyone and everything out of my life. I was trapped in darkness. I couldn’t understand why I was here or why I existed. I couldn’t understand why I got to “be” and I couldn’t figure out how to be anymore. And then I made the realization that Hashem made me. Hashem created me and gave me a soul, a Jewish soul, and breathed life into my body. And while I very much AM a body, I am my spirit and soul and the only real and tangible thing I can hold on to from day to day, in this life, if my faith and I am so grateful to Hashem for making me Jewish and bringing me back to my faith. I wouldn’t still be here today without it and It has transformed my life mentally and spiritually. It changed the way my mind thinks, feels and functions. It was just what I needed to relearn HOW to LIVE in this world on a day to day basis and bring me back to the light. I finally feel like I am experiencing being human again and what it’s like to live and love and be alive. And also, my neice was born. I’m an Aunt and it’s been another of the greatest gifts of my life. She is a total munchkin and my role as an Aunt is the best role I’ve ever played. 😉 I know I’ve stilll been distant with my friends and I need to work on that. Please don’t take it personally. I just haven’t figured out how to navigate too much spontaneity and have trouble making plans. I want to work on that this year and bring you all back into my life. I haven’t been exercising or training or racing, for anyone who has been wondering. I don’t know if I will ever return to those things. I’m just not motivated in the same way by and for the things as I used to be. Sometimes I find that girl hiding inside & think I can blend my 2 lives together but I haven’t been able to figure out how to do that yet.
Covid update that no one asked for: I can’t taste or smell anything. I will never take my taste buds or sense of smell for granted ever again. It’s so strange that a tiny virus can have such a big effect on how we experience our lives.
I FINALLY got permission from Spartan, as long as I’m not using it for promotion, (thanks, Carlo!) to share this commercial we made years ago in California! I don’t know why they never used it but it was so cool to be a part of this shoot. What do you think? Should Spartan have released this commercial?
My most favorite commercial to date and One of the biggest jobs I was ever a part of. Garnier Olia Hair Color. I love that I got to be myself :). We talked SO much about Obstacle racing but none of that made it into the project. This was such an amazing experience! Thank you, @lorealparis @lorealusa @garnierusa @garnier @bethmelskycasting
I’ve been MIA, but I’m still here. Sometimes it’s okay to hibernate and spend time mentally and spiritually processing life and your life. Don’t feel guiltly taking time away from societal norms, like going out and socializing and social media, to figure out what’s going on in your own head. After all, that’s what you have to live with every day. You must find a way to exist peacefully within yourself. At the end of the day, it’s you and Hashem. Always. So take YOUR time. Savor the moment of your life. Put down the phone and look up at your life. Put down the pressures and live. To all who observe, May you have a peaceful and restful and fun Shabbos, or whatever version of Shabbos you wuoud like!, and may all have a lovely weekend and great week ahead. I hope you accomplish all you set out in your heart to do. Now and forever. 😀 Photo generated with AI.
How’s it hanging? How is your Holiday season going? Are you in that weird in-between where you don’t know who you are, what you should be doing, or what day it is until after New Years comes?
After 13 days I’m finally Covid Negative! Happy Hannukkah! I invite you to light your Menorah this year and connect to your faith and your freedom to express your faith. 2 truths and a lie: post your guess on the lie in the comments: 1. I bought my Menorah at CVS 2. It’s my first year ever lighting Hanukkah candles in my own home 3. I ate an entire Challah today The history of the eight-day celebration is rooted in the rededication of the Holy Temple after the Jewish people reclaimed it from the Syrian-Greeks in the second century BCE. As they worked to restore the temple, they used an oil lamp fueled by a tiny bit of oil that was only supposed to last one day. The oil miraculously lasted for eight days, and that is what is considered the Hanukkah miracle. According to National Geographic, the Syrian-Greeks invaded the Jewish homeland and captured Jerusalem, where the Jewish Holy Temple was located. After the invasion, they attempted to force the Jewish people to forgo their religion and customs and adopt Greek beliefs instead. The Syrian-Greeks desecrated the Holy Temple and enacted laws forbidding the practice of Judaism.
Some times I still feel like this girl and some times I feel like I’m looking at a picture of someone else. It’s amazing how malleable our minds are and how easy it is to switch from one mindset and perspective to another. One simple thought can change the way you perceive your entire reality and how you behave it it. I wish my mind wasn’t so easily effected by these things. Maybe it’s the same for us all. I don’t know. Maybe these are states of being, states of emotions or consciousness. All I know is one simple word or thought effects my entire being. Is this just being sensitive? Is there something else going on? All I can do is hope that I find my way out each time I fall into a little pit inside my mind. Can anyone else relate?
Impractical Jokers or Impractical Perri? The world may never know.
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This AI photo of me makes me look like Princess Kate outside a castle somewhere in Scotland and im here for it. Do you think you can tell when a photo is AI?
Just a throwback to a great shoot with @sub_urban_photography 👌
How many existential crisis are too much for one day? Do you ever find your state of mine changing from moment to moment? I can literally feel mine changing multiple times per day. Sometimes something as simple as a car ride or a walk from the garage to getting in the car can change my state of kind and being from present to some sort of living in my head, separate from the now and feeling like my consciousness is asleep even though I’m fully awake. It’s not always easy to articulate but sometimes it just feels like my life slips away and my mind changes perspectives ans the way I perceive reality and the world around me shifts. It’s not frightening, it’s just inconvenient. Anyone else? *photo made with AI
I dislike winter. I enjoy the snow and cozy weather but I dislike how short the days get. It really messes with my head. It feels like it’s nighttime all the time! And with my susceptibility for depression, it really does a number on my mental health. Does anyone else feel this way about winter?
Another day, Another reel! How about a little, fin “get to know me”. Answer the questions in the comments so we can get to know eachother!!
My most watched reel of all time! 8million views on TikTok!! Can we match that here on Instagram? Let’s find out. 🙂 I definitely perturbed some Gen Z with this one. :p
Happy soon-to-be 4th night of Hanukkah! It’s so special to be living in a time where we can ALL express our faiths fully and openly. I feel so grateful that ive reconnected to my Jewish Faith at such a pivotal moment in time. Swipe ➡️ to check out a few prayers you can recite tonight in honor of the Hanukkah celebration and miracle. Even If you haven’t done so already, it’s not to late to start lighting a Menorah this holiday. I really did pick mine up from CVS the other day! (See previous post). Go to Target or even order one on Amazon or make your own! It’s in your DNA and soul, and encoded in every fiber of your being, to use the vessel Hashem has given you to speak these blessings and connect with your faith. With something deep within yourself that has always been there and will always be there. You might find that it is more a part of you and more comfortable than you expect it to be. There is power in words, and power in prayer and faith, and invite you to see what it feels like to connect to that and maybe this one act leads to more ways to connect to Hashem and your faith in your every day life. I’ve made many realizations over the last 6 months, and what better way to use my eyes, lips, ears and body than to express my faith the way Hashem has commanded us and to give thanks to Hashem for giving me life and the ability to experience life. I hope you experience as much love and light as possible now, forever and always. Happy Hanukkah 🙂
Happy soon-to-be 4th night of Hanukkah! It’s so special to be living in a time where we can ALL express our faiths fully and openly. I feel so grateful that ive reconnected to my Jewish Faith at such a pivotal moment in time. Swipe ➡️ to check out a few prayers you can recite tonight in honor of the Hanukkah celebration and miracle. Even If you haven’t done so already, it’s not to late to start lighting a Menorah this holiday. I really did pick mine up from CVS the other day! (See previous post). Go to Target or even order one on Amazon or make your own! It’s in your DNA and soul, and encoded in every fiber of your being, to use the vessel Hashem has given you to speak these blessings and connect with your faith. With something deep within yourself that has always been there and will always be there. You might find that it is more a part of you and more comfortable than you expect it to be. There is power in words, and power in prayer and faith, and invite you to see what it feels like to connect to that and maybe this one act leads to more ways to connect to Hashem and your faith in your every day life. I’ve made many realizations over the last 6 months, and what better way to use my eyes, lips, ears and body than to express my faith the way Hashem has commanded us and to give thanks to Hashem for giving me life and the ability to experience life. I hope you experience as much love and light as possible now, forever and always. Happy Hanukkah 🙂
Wishing a wonderful Shabbat Shalom to all who observe! And a very Happy and Healthy New Year to all!! Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! Do we miss the Spartan content? #shabbatshalom #firejumpfriday
One of my most favorite jobs of all time front the brilliant mind of @kylesauer for @warbyparker back when the big solar eclipse was about to happen. Such a fun day and experience!!! I REALLY wanted to book this job, too 🙂
Part Deux.
Congrats @old_runner_guy! Im giving away a $10 Gift Card for your favorite protein bars! Win a free $10 Gift Card to Built.com! All you have to do is: 1. FOLLOW me on IG 2. LIKE this post 3. TAG a friend. (Each tag is an entry/unlimited entries) 4. 10 BONUS ENTRIES if you share this post to your IG stories or repost it to your feed and tag @spartanchickie May the odds be ever in your favor! #giveaway
🌟 Curious about conquering more than just racecourses? 🏃♀️ In this Hack, learn insights and tips from @spartanchickie, a resilient soul who’s aced 80 races. 🏅 Read more on the app. Link in Bio. #SpartanTriumph #FaithInAction #HackOfResilience #UptimeApp #NewHack
