Pauly Shore Instagram – I just read the amazing news that Richard Simmons wants Tom Cruise to play him in his biopic. That’s fantastic! Tom Cruise should play YOU. I should play YOU. Tom Arnold should play YOU. Everybody should play YOU. There’s so much great story to tell! But, for real, Tom Cruise playing Richard is perfect casting! Genius. Why didn’t I think of that? He definitely resembles Richard more than me, don’t you think? And I understand why Richard wants Tom to play him. Because Tom Cruise is sexxxyyy. And I’m an ugly duckling. Not cool, doooodz. I definitely can’t compete with Mission Impossible.
Come to think of it, all of this is just too much for me. I’m dropping out of the race like Nikki Haley. I’m opting out. I’m gonna move to a forest in Bangladesh and just do ayahuasca for the next month and rethink my life. Goodbye my Richard Simmons biopic dreams.
P.S. Richard, when I do my biopic, can you please play ME? | Posted on 27/Apr/2024 03:34:57
