Pauly Shore Instagram – You guys, I was up all night crying regarding Richard Simmons’ tweet. Richard, how do you not approve of this movie? I mean, really, who’s better to play you in a movie than ME? Leonardo DiCaprio’s not gonna play you. Brad Pitt’s not gonna play you. I’m perfect. Everyone already thinks I’m you. We’re the same. Beautiful, inside and out. Hellll yea!
Richard, you haven’t even heard the pitch. Why don’t you simply let me come over to your house, bring you some warm matzo ball soup and a pastrami sandwich with dark mustard from Canters, rub your feet, and we can listen to the writer, Jordan Allen-Dutton, pitch you our idea?
I know you, Richard. We used to hang out back in the day. I’d always see you at The Comedy Store. You’re my old buddy. Richard, you’re going to love our movie. We’re going to make the most beautiful cinematic masterpiece that’s going to honor you in a way that you’ll drop to your knees and cry with joy and happiness.
And I also heard the good news that you’re in talks with studios to do a biopic about yourself. That’s amazing! The more movies about you, the better! You deserve it. There should be hundreds made.
But as you know, many biopics are made without the subject agreeing to be part of it: Elvis, Stephen Hawking, Marilyn Monroe, Steve Jobs and many, many more. Some of them turned out good, some of them turned out bad. Mine is going to turn out amaze-balls. So… let me know when you want me to come over with yummy food from Canters, and Jordan and I will pitch you in your living room. I love you, Richard, and so did my mom.
Love you always,
Your old friend Pauly Shore
@theweightsaint | Posted on 26/Apr/2024 04:51:24
