For the latest episode of Dua Lipa: At Your Service, @dualipa is in conversation with relationship expert Esther Perel (@estherperelofficial). In this clip, they explore the impact of a dissatisfied mindset on relationships: ‘You find yourself leaving a relationship, not because you are unhappy, but because you could be happier. And then you are in pursuit all the time,’ says Esther.
For more valuable insights from Esther, listen to the full episode on your preferred podcast platform or ad free in the UK on @bbcsounds! You can also join Esther on a journey to understand human connection and modern relationships on her podcast, ‘Where Should We Begin?’, which returns on 10 July, with new episodes weekly.
Conflict in relationships is inevitable. It might surprise you to know that my new course is not meant to stop you from fighting…but rather to equip you to fight better and repair more effectively.
Turning Conflict Into Connection is about more than avoiding clashes; it’s about embracing the ebb and flow, the dance of differences that make a relationship whole. Steering clear of all conflict results in a connection of two halves, not two wholes. Alternatively, engaging in endless conflicts leads to unresolved issues and entrenched patterns.
Breaking free from these cycles requires stepping out of routine, challenging assumptions, and embracing change. This transformative process is explored step by step in my new course. Visit the link in my bio for more details.
Contained within every promise is an oath of accountability: an understanding that something will or will not be done. A resolution, on the other hand, is a declaration of desire. Resolutions activate a mental state of regard for our quality of being. In this mindset, we live in the exhilarating in-between of who we have been and who we wish to be. The fantasy of a clean slate motivates us to change.
As 2023 comes to a close, we find ourselves standing at the threshold of a new beginning, teetering between the echoes of the past and the aspirations of the future. It is a moment ripe with potential, a time to reflect not only on the promises we make to ourselves but also on the stories we must release.
So, my question for you is, this new year, what are you ready to let go of and what are you inviting in?
Dating today is less about wanting a life together, and more about having experiences that satisfy us and our sense of self, even if it’s temporary. We are always looking for the next best thing.
As we shift the focus to ourselves, we become more of a consumer, and as consumers, we are taught to evaluate meticulously. We want to ensure value in our relationships, return on investment, and if or when the value seems to drop, we’re caught asking ourselves if there’s a better deal out there.
The concepts explored in Mating in Captivity may be even more true today than when I wrote the book years ago. To explore my cornerstone philosophy and some of my foundational work, visit the link in my bio to check out the book.
She called me for a reality check. “I’m wondering if I’m being gaslit by my partner or if I’m just being overly sensitive,” she said in a shaky Irish brogue. The content of her examples told me her side of the story: he hounded her when she was sick. He picked fights right before seeing friends (and then welcomed said friends as if nothing was wrong). He berated her constantly about how mean she was, all whilst yelling at her. Her tone, unsure and exhausted, told me more.
To hear more about this upcoming episode of Where Should We Begin? follow the link in my bio to this month’s newsletter. And stay tuned as we discuss manipulation and distortion that can happen in relationships and how to answer important questions like this one.
Beginning July 10th, you can listen to new episodes weekly of Where Should We Begin? on Apple Podcast or anywhere else you get your podcasts.
She called me for a reality check. “I’m wondering if I’m being gaslit by my partner or if I’m just being overly sensitive,” she said in a shaky Irish brogue. The content of her examples told me her side of the story: he hounded her when she was sick. He picked fights right before seeing friends (and then welcomed said friends as if nothing was wrong). He berated her constantly about how mean she was, all whilst yelling at her. Her tone, unsure and exhausted, told me more.
To hear more about this upcoming episode of Where Should We Begin? follow the link in my bio to this month’s newsletter. And stay tuned as we discuss manipulation and distortion that can happen in relationships and how to answer important questions like this one.
Beginning July 10th, you can listen to new episodes weekly of Where Should We Begin? on Apple Podcast or anywhere else you get your podcasts.
I’m very interested in writing or thinking about masculinity because I think that the 20th century is when women made tremendous changes, and the 21st century will be when men adapt to those changes that women have made. Throughout history, we’ve seen masculinity as natural, uncomplicated, a given. But if it was that much of a given, I don’t know why masculinity always has to be defined, redefined, and proven. Men are constantly told to “show you’re a man,” “prove you’re a man,” and “don’t be emasculated.” So masculinity isn’t often a given, but rather, a very fragile identity that is often hard to acquire and easy to lose.
I explore this topic and the many facets of masculinity and the experience of manhood with @menshealthmag. Follow the link in my story to read on.
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Spend enough time with @estherperelofficial — psychotherapist and host of the podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ — and you’ll start to pick up a new lexicon for describing the vastly complicated and always evolving matrix of human emotions. As Perel joins the New York family with her podcast re-launching under the Vox Media Podcast Network, we asked Perel’s editor, co-writer, and head of content, Mary Alice Miller for a sampling of such terms, gleaned from Perel’s podcasts, books, and many conversations. At the link in bio, Miller tells us about six — of both the timely and evergreen variety — to know.
You can follow the other link in bio to listen to the latest episodes of Esther’s podcast, out now.
Photo-Illustration: the Cut; Photos Getty Images
Seven years ago, Where Should We Begin? was conceived with that very idea—where should we begin? I had known for awhile that I wanted to open the office and take therapy into the public square, but this would be the opposite: taking the public into the office.
Therapy is so often a practice of privilege, accessible and affordable to very few. The conception of this podcast was an opportunity to democratize therapy and to empower couples to embrace the reality of relational dynamics so that they could improve their own. The more deeply they listen, the more they see themselves in their own mirror. The more they hear real couples navigating real problems, the more they feel empowered to heal their own.
I’m happy to announce that under The @voxmedia Podcast Network, we are returning on July 10th with a NEW season – one that has a weekly, always-on cadence. Join me every Monday for a brand new episode that will cover a wide spectrum of modern relationships ranging from couples and friends to work colleagues and family members.
Special bonus content featuring behind-the-scenes and on-the-record conversations with incredible friends from the arts, entertainment, psychotherapy and beyond will also be available for subscribers for the very first time via a partnership with Apple Podcasts.
You can tune in on Apple or anywhere else you get your podcasts. Follow the link in my bio to subscribe and stay tuned for July 10th!
BIG ANNOUNCEMENT: Where Should We Begin? The Podcast is BACK.
Some of you have been with me since the very beginning, patiently awaiting the return of a new season. And others are just discovering my podcast for the first time, so allow me to introduce you to Where Should We Begin?
Seven years ago, I started this project to break down the four walls of my therapy office and invite you to listen into the intimate, raw, anonymous, and unedited conversation of other couples. So often we have no idea what is happening in other relationships, causing us to feel very alone in our experiences behind closed doors.
Where Should We Begin? helps us understand how universal our issues and experiences can be. Exposing the inner workings of other relationships helps us see ourselves, providing tools and strategies, helping us connect to one another.
I hope you join us weekly as we bring you new episodes every Monday in collaboration with our new partners at @voxmedia. And in collaboration with @applepodcasts, we are thrilled to offer exclusive bonus content through Apple subscriptions for the very first time.
So, I invite you to spread the word! As you know, it takes a village, and you all are part of mine. Please share, comment, and tag your friends. Send your favorite episodes to loved ones or those you believe could benefit from listening.
Follow the link in my bio to listen on Apple Podcasts or your preferred podcast platform — I am so happy to be back and can’t wait to hear what you think.
Friendships are their own love stories. Our friends provide continuity in an ever-changing world. They accompany us through the trials and tribulations of lovers that come and go, job changes, family rifts, births, deaths, and recoveries. And in the case of Neil Patrick Harris it’s his 50th birthday that has brought friends from all the corners of his life together- which as he tells me can bring some anxiety too.
In my new Apple Podcasts subscription episode, I’m joined by the actor and Tony Award winner @nph for an intimate chat. Visit the link in my bio to begin your free trial and join in on the conversation.
Friendships are their own love stories. Our friends provide continuity in an ever-changing world. They accompany us through the trials and tribulations of lovers that come and go, job changes, family rifts, births, deaths, and recoveries. And in the case of Neil Patrick Harris it’s his 50th birthday that has brought friends from all the corners of his life together- which as he tells me can bring some anxiety too.
In my new Apple Podcasts subscription episode, I’m joined by the actor and Tony Award winner @nph for an intimate chat. Visit the link in my bio to begin your free trial and join in on the conversation.
Some of the most challenging and the most painful or sad sessions for me are the ones where I accompany a couple in their dissolution, in the end of a relationship, where one person is out and the other person is holding on for dear life.
In a recent episode of my podcast, Where Should We Begin? I sat down with a married couple who after 20 years, wonder if their marriage has run its course. Join me in this heart-wrenching episode titled, “She’s Out. He’s Still In.” as I explore his desire for hope and her desire for change.
After, I invite you to step into my Office Hours on Apple Podcasts Subscriptions as I reflect on the emotions I encountered during my session with them.
Desire, to me, is existential—it defines our modern lives by embodying our wants and expressing our sovereign selves. Understanding its nature is key to reconnecting—to ourselves, to our vitality. Stay tuned for an upcoming opportunity to dive deeper into this topic with me. What does desire mean to you?
A good question changes the story. It disrupts a pattern. It goes deeper. Sometimes, it goes sideways. It enables us to travel to a new place without ever leaving one another’s side. This is exactly what the audience questions did during my East Coast tour. Engaging with audience members, especially through the thought-provoking questions they posed, allowed us to find all that we had in common and to delight in what made us each unique. Knowing these questions can’t all be addressed in one evening, I invited those who didn’t get a chance to ask theirs in person to submit them. I dedicated a special episode to answering and exploring these questions in depth, continuing our dialogue as if we were all still together in the theater. As I take a summer break to recharge, I look forward to continuing the West Coast portion of the tour in September and answering more of your questions. Tune into “Esther Takes Your Questions” on your Apple Podcast subscription of Where Should We Begin? Photos captured by: @cwfour
A good question changes the story. It disrupts a pattern. It goes deeper. Sometimes, it goes sideways. It enables us to travel to a new place without ever leaving one another’s side. This is exactly what the audience questions did during my East Coast tour. Engaging with audience members, especially through the thought-provoking questions they posed, allowed us to find all that we had in common and to delight in what made us each unique. Knowing these questions can’t all be addressed in one evening, I invited those who didn’t get a chance to ask theirs in person to submit them. I dedicated a special episode to answering and exploring these questions in depth, continuing our dialogue as if we were all still together in the theater. As I take a summer break to recharge, I look forward to continuing the West Coast portion of the tour in September and answering more of your questions. Tune into “Esther Takes Your Questions” on your Apple Podcast subscription of Where Should We Begin? Photos captured by: @cwfour
A good question changes the story. It disrupts a pattern. It goes deeper. Sometimes, it goes sideways. It enables us to travel to a new place without ever leaving one another’s side. This is exactly what the audience questions did during my East Coast tour. Engaging with audience members, especially through the thought-provoking questions they posed, allowed us to find all that we had in common and to delight in what made us each unique. Knowing these questions can’t all be addressed in one evening, I invited those who didn’t get a chance to ask theirs in person to submit them. I dedicated a special episode to answering and exploring these questions in depth, continuing our dialogue as if we were all still together in the theater. As I take a summer break to recharge, I look forward to continuing the West Coast portion of the tour in September and answering more of your questions. Tune into “Esther Takes Your Questions” on your Apple Podcast subscription of Where Should We Begin? Photos captured by: @cwfour
It’s been 17 years since psychotherapist Esther Perel published her first best-selling book, ‘Mating in Captivity,’ introduced the idea of “erotic intelligence” (or at least an updated, 21st-century version of it) into the public consciousness, and soon became a TED Talk star (her first talk has over 20 million views and counting). Today, we are thrilled to welcome @estherperelofficial to the Vox Media Podcast Network, where the latest season of her podcast ‘Where Should We Begin?’ is now available.
Over five seasons of ‘Where Should We Begin?,’ Perel brought her audience into the therapy room, letting them listen in as she conducted real sessions with real couples untangling very real issues. For the new season, Perel’s team received 6,000 applicants; among them, there’s a couple split apart by the war in Ukraine, one woman worried she’s being gaslighted by her partner, and of course, more stories about infidelity.
As we welcome the podcast to the New York podcast family, the Cut has put together an Esther Perel syllabus: a guide to her approach to therapy and relationships, her body of work, and references, plus a few behind-the-scenes glimpses into the process of making the show. Whether you’re a die-hard fan who has already subscribed, are tuning in for the very first time, or just want to know Perel’s favorite sexy movies, there’s surely something at the link(s) in bio to up your erotic IQ.
Photo-illustration by The Cut
