Me and the girls at the Gare du Nord, Paris, on the 31st January 2025. It’s my late Mum’s birthday. She would have been 85. I last saw my Mum at the Gare du Nord, Paris, on the 16th September 1999. I had no idea it was going to be the last time. I was flustered because I couldn’t find a place to park and wanted to help her with her heavy case but the minutes were ticking away and we were panicking that she would miss her train. Eventually we decided it would be better for me to drop her up front, as close as possible, and let her get in the queue while I found a spot. She’d just had an angioplasty and her entire arm was still black and blue and I cried as I let her get out with her little case. In the rear view mirror I watched her drag it across the cobble stones into the station as I waited for the light to turn green. That’s it, I thought. But then, out of the blue, I spotted a tiny little gap between two large cars right around the corner, and managed to squeeze mine in between. Clocked Mum almost at the front of the line – she hadn’t quite gone through passport control. I yelled ‘Muuuum!’ And came running. Her face lit up. I ran into the last hug I would ever have and looked into her big blue eyes. ‘I’ve got to go!’ She laughed, indicating the people getting anxious in the queue behind us I know, I know.’ I said. ‘I just wanted one last hug.’ And so it went. ‘I’ll see you in three weeks! ‘ I yelled up to the bridge she was crossing to get to her platform. She gave me her mesmerizing big smile and a thumbs up. ‘Yes! Got to go now!’ She stumbled across the bridge with her travel paraphernalia. That smile. That little blue jacket slowly disappearing. Me letting out a sigh of relief – she was on her train – and simultaneously wondering where the hell I had put the car.. She died exactly 2 weeks later, at the age of 59. She would have been 85 today. The kids and I had a moment for her: the granny they would have loved ( and vice versa) but who they never got the chance to meet. It’s kismet for me that our first solo trip to Paris had us arriving at that sacred, but painful place exactly on her birthday. 🩷 #motherlove #mum #mother #girlmum #love
Slapathon with the cast of #theoriginals….
Mother and daughter in four iterations. Esther et sa fille préférée Freya😂 Amazing weekend. Vous avez tous ete tellement doux et sympathiques et vos histoires m’ont touchées jusqu’au fond de mon cœur. France, je t’adore. 🩷
Mother and daughter in four iterations. Esther et sa fille préférée Freya😂 Amazing weekend. Vous avez tous ete tellement doux et sympathiques et vos histoires m’ont touchées jusqu’au fond de mon cœur. France, je t’adore. 🩷
Mother and daughter in four iterations. Esther et sa fille préférée Freya😂 Amazing weekend. Vous avez tous ete tellement doux et sympathiques et vos histoires m’ont touchées jusqu’au fond de mon cœur. France, je t’adore. 🩷
Mother and daughter in four iterations. Esther et sa fille préférée Freya😂 Amazing weekend. Vous avez tous ete tellement doux et sympathiques et vos histoires m’ont touchées jusqu’au fond de mon cœur. France, je t’adore. 🩷
Incoming rant: Hey haters! Hey @aburkhartlaw! Remember you came to my court hearing last Monday? Mocked me on your instagram for saying I was having trouble paying for my kids upbringing? Well this is the stuff you don’t know about if you’re not a parent and you’re not living in America. And this is WITH insurance. My youngest has been sick for over ten days a day x-rays showed congestion on her lungs. If I want her father to contribute to this I have to EMAIL my lawyer ($600 an hour) to get him to email his THREE LAWYERS ($300, $300 and $600 per hour respectively) to get those lawyers to then email back and forth discussing whether my ex, who has zero custody and does not see the kids or return their calls and is completely free to work but chooses not to, should pay it or if I should – the single mother with no help who has to leave the kids with friends for four nights this weekend because I have no babysitter, and their father has chosen not to help. ( I will gladly spend every last penny on my kids – but this is what the cost of living is – this is the reality, and even with very lucrative fan conventions I can’t quite make it work alone AND be their Mum. Perhaps some of you can if so more power to you.) Make it make sense. Also, to whoever may feel like jumping in, PLEASE feel free to yell ‘restraining order’ at me and make vague threats of jail. I am not disturbing the ‘peace’ of my ex ( if this disturbs his peace you really have to wonder) I am just telling it as it is. The system sucks. Both the shitty for profit healthcare system and the family court industrial complex. So to my wonderful support system and followers on here – I love you more than words can say. To my haters and that walking, talking piece of crap @aburkhartlaw, please bring it on. I’m not shutting up any time soon. Oh and @anthemhealth you absolutely suck. Shame on you for providing ‘insurance’ with co-pays like this. Ok! I’m done. I love you all. Love my kids too. Bonus happy pic of Elsie after this getting her Albuterol in the doctor’s office today. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Incoming rant: Hey haters! Hey @aburkhartlaw! Remember you came to my court hearing last Monday? Mocked me on your instagram for saying I was having trouble paying for my kids upbringing? Well this is the stuff you don’t know about if you’re not a parent and you’re not living in America. And this is WITH insurance. My youngest has been sick for over ten days a day x-rays showed congestion on her lungs. If I want her father to contribute to this I have to EMAIL my lawyer ($600 an hour) to get him to email his THREE LAWYERS ($300, $300 and $600 per hour respectively) to get those lawyers to then email back and forth discussing whether my ex, who has zero custody and does not see the kids or return their calls and is completely free to work but chooses not to, should pay it or if I should – the single mother with no help who has to leave the kids with friends for four nights this weekend because I have no babysitter, and their father has chosen not to help. ( I will gladly spend every last penny on my kids – but this is what the cost of living is – this is the reality, and even with very lucrative fan conventions I can’t quite make it work alone AND be their Mum. Perhaps some of you can if so more power to you.) Make it make sense. Also, to whoever may feel like jumping in, PLEASE feel free to yell ‘restraining order’ at me and make vague threats of jail. I am not disturbing the ‘peace’ of my ex ( if this disturbs his peace you really have to wonder) I am just telling it as it is. The system sucks. Both the shitty for profit healthcare system and the family court industrial complex. So to my wonderful support system and followers on here – I love you more than words can say. To my haters and that walking, talking piece of crap @aburkhartlaw, please bring it on. I’m not shutting up any time soon. Oh and @anthemhealth you absolutely suck. Shame on you for providing ‘insurance’ with co-pays like this. Ok! I’m done. I love you all. Love my kids too. Bonus happy pic of Elsie after this getting her Albuterol in the doctor’s office today. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
BTS of the group photo in the green room today! Love these people so much. Thank you to all the fans who turned up this weekend you brought me to tears with your love and kindness.. #thebloodlegacy2 #theoriginals #tvd #vampirediaries #thevampirediaries #love #paris #loveourfans
Missed this one.. my honey 🩷 @leahmariepipes10 Esther/Camille love-in! #tvd #theoriginals #tvdu #esther #camille #cloudscon @cloudscon
Looking and feeling like crap today. Posting this instead and it feels GOOD😂😏 Need to rest up and get better. New Orleans next weekend! Come and get pics with me! @creationent #neworleans #vampirefanweekend #27-29sept #tvd #theoriginals #aliceevans #esther
Help me rank the vampire boys in order! How did I do? What’s your ranking? #tdv #theoriginals #esthermikaelson #aliceevans #girlmom #esther #vampirediaries #thevampirediaries
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Oh my. My heart is bursting. The kids at Elsie’s school organized this THEMSELVES. They’re 10! One of the amazing Moms turned up at our house as a surprise and brought a care package. Candy, cards galore, small pebbles/rocks (?😂) notes, little puzzles they’d brought from home. They did it themselves. (Apologies for the repetition I am just blown away) They even got permission to go class to class to root out some of Elsie’s close friends in other classes so they wouldn’t miss anyone. There is so much love on this world! #kidsarewonderful #blownaway #grateful
Ranking the ladies….😍
Yes! Managed to get ‘Jack Huston’ to call me ‘Tiggle Wiggle’. Finally. Victory lap! Yes I know it’s puerile and a huge waste of time to engage scammers but look – I am sick in bed anyway and it’s SO MUCH FUN😂 PS: Apologies to my friend @thejackhuston for posting this.
Yes! Managed to get ‘Jack Huston’ to call me ‘Tiggle Wiggle’. Finally. Victory lap! Yes I know it’s puerile and a huge waste of time to engage scammers but look – I am sick in bed anyway and it’s SO MUCH FUN😂 PS: Apologies to my friend @thejackhuston for posting this.
Yes! Managed to get ‘Jack Huston’ to call me ‘Tiggle Wiggle’. Finally. Victory lap! Yes I know it’s puerile and a huge waste of time to engage scammers but look – I am sick in bed anyway and it’s SO MUCH FUN😂 PS: Apologies to my friend @thejackhuston for posting this.
Wow. Can’t stop thinking about this. When an adverse life event hits us, for whatever reason, we can find ourselves thrashing around like a drowning person in the ocean trying to grab on to something – anything that will keep us afloat. What we’re grasping for is somebody to trust. Personally I find myself in a space where I now EXPECT to be let down. I expect people to suddenly switch on me because of something they’ve read in the newspaper, to randomly question my motives or my truth (although it’s never changed) or my needs. This creates such a high level of anxiety it can be crippling. At the same time, some truly incredible people have come through for me and it may sound crazy but at the moment at least three of my ride or die people who have dug me out of the deepest holes both physically and mentally in the past few years and who are the first people I turn to when the shit hits the fan I didn’t even KNOW a few years ago. So out of need and necessity have been born incredible relationships that I might not otherwise have experienced. All this to say: be someone your loved ones can trust. Trust is such an important human need and we don’t talk about it enough. 🩷 #trust
