One thing we won’t be doing is making fun of the children. I have never supported that with any President’s kids but especially Gus. I am proud to be part of Special Olympics in Texas for my nephew. Gus reminds me of my nephew. One thing I will not stand for is anyone taking away a moment of pure joy and love this kid feels for his dad. You can criticize the candidates all you want. Leave the kids alone.
Vicks. @Cristela9 returns to the @OntarioImprov January 17-19! #jokes #comedy #standup #improvcomedyclubs #comedyclub #fyp #cristelaalonzo
Hi!!! Unfollow me. I don’t care. I’ve been hated by better people. Someone else will take your place really quick. I’ll also be doing a couple events in Chicago DNC week. If you thought I wasn’t political, you should see me first special. I can’t stand Trump. Never have. 🥰
Today, I spoke at a panel about passing legislation for care workers and crossed paths with my bestie Dolores as she was on her way to a panel too. Si se puede. ✊🏽❤️
Undecided voter* *I have to explain this is a joke because there are people that don’t fully understand sentences.
The older I get, the more I’m starting to like myself. A lot of it is pride. When I was a kid, I never thought I’d ever be in a place where I could afford to go to the doctor. I can afford emergencies…and I do it all by doing something I love. I am lucky. I know I am and I am grateful for it all. Tonight, one show in Monterey. Tomorrow, one show in San Luis Obispo at @fremontslo. Hope you’re all having a good day.
When you’re workout becomes a movie night… THIS WEEKEND: I’m coming to do one show in Monterey, CA and San Luis Obispo, CA. It’s my first time playing these cities and I can’t wait. Tickets available here: Aug. 23: Monterey, CA – @gstheatremonterey Aug. 24: San Luis Obispo, CA – @fremontslo Also, this clip is from my first @netflixisajoke special #LowerClassy. During this time, I think I had just found out I was diabetic which is why I got the dvds. I was editing this clip and laughing at how outdated DVDs sound now. LOL.
Tonight’s selfie from the backstage @westgatevegas…about to go up at Elvis Presley’s theater. Let’s do this. 🥰
Random selfie from Canelo fight tonight.
RANDOM SUNDAY THOUGHT: It’s not supposed to be a downer. Just a reminder that every day you wake up, you write a new part of your story. What we leave behind is how people will remember us. If you’ve seen my latest hour, you know that I talk about trying to really live. Don’t hold off and try to make “fun” something you work towards because you will never work enough to think you deserve to have fun. ❤️
Thank you Monterey and SLO for the shows this weekend! NEXT SHOW: LAS VEGAS! September 15 at the @westgatevegas Mexican Independence weekend! Get tickets here: https://www.westgateresorts.com/hotels/nevada/las-vegas/westgate-las-vegas-resort-casino/entertainment/cristela-alonzo/ (OR LINK IN BIO)
THIS SUNDAY! LAS VEGAS! Doing ONE show @westgatevegas at 8pm to kick off Mexican Independence Day! Let’s get our “Mexicanos al grito de guerra” party mode on! Tickets available: cristelaalonzo.com Also, vote for me whenever I run for office so you can get legislation like this.
LOS ANGELES! March 30. The Wiltern. Presale tickets are on sale NOW!! Use code: CLASSY to get your tickets before they go on sale to the public on Friday! Ticket link: https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/09006186C11D3A10 One show @thewiltern. Hope to see you there! 🥰
Today is #NationalVoterRegistrationDay and I want to make sure you’re all registered to vote! Go to vote.org and look it up. And it’s not just voting for President. It’s about voting for everything. The propositions, the Senate, the House…EVERYTHING! Especialmente para los Latinos. Votando en esta elección ayuda a nuestras comunidades!!
JUST ANNOUNCED! LOS ANGELES! I’m coming to The Wiltern on March 30! I’m doing ONE show @thewiltern – presale tickets go on sale TOMORROW morning! 🎤 Artist Presale starts Thursday 12/12 @ 10 AM Use Code: Classy Ticket link here (and also in bio): ticketmaster.com/event/09006186C11D3A10
You’ve seen her Netflix specials, now catch Cristela Alonzo live at the International Theater on September 15th. Get ready to laugh till your sides hurt! Tickets available at Ticketmaster
Let’s start off 2025 with some cities I’ll be coming to do shows at! Here’s the deal: I’m shooting my THIRD Netflix special THIS YEAR. I will announce the location soon. I will be adding more cities to my list! These cities are all on sale except for Reno! 2025 is the year of #UpperClassy Tickets: cristelaalonzo.com or at the venues’ pages
Thursday! Excited to be part of this as we talk about what’s at stake for the country and talk strategy about getting Harris/Walz into our history books! Register at tinyurl.com/rallyforkamala (link in bio) 👏🏽
NEXT SHOW: LAS VEGAS! SEPT 15! I’m coming back to @westgatevegas the night before el día de independencia de Mexico! Let’s get our “Mexicanos al grito de guerra” on! Haha. See you there! Tickets available at the casino page or link in bio. #lasvegas #cristela
CALIFORNIA DATES: Next weekend, I’m doing TWO shows: FRIDAY: @gstheatremonterey Monterey SATURDAY: @fremontslo San Luis Obispo. Tickets available at my website: cristelaalonzo.com
JUST ADDED: Houston tickets to my website and I forgot to add the ALBUQUERQUE SHOWS IN DECEMBER TO MY POSTER! Perdón! NEXT SHOWS: BREA, CA! FIVE SHOWS @breaimprov What’s up everybody! These are the shows I have left in 2024. Thank you to everyone that came out to Las Vegas this past weekend. I had a lot of fun. During the week, I’m working on the new Reba McIntyre sitcom #HappysPlace coming to NBC next month but during the weekends…I am on the road working on my set that will become my next hour. Come check out the progress! Tickets available at: cristelaalonzo.com
THIS SUNDAY! LAS VEGAS! Doing ONE show @westgatevegas at 8pm to kick off Mexican Independence Day! Let’s get our “Mexicanos al grito de guerra” party mode on! Tickets available: cristelaalonzo.com
“Can we do minimum wage? Can we do maximum wage? Why are we bare minimum on this?” Writer, producer, and actress, @cristela9 wants people to know that her community also cares about issues beyond immigration.
TOMORROW NIGHT! MAÑANA! Ay now vemos! I’m in Las Vegas this weekend to kick off Mexican Independence Day! Tickets available @westgatevegas
