Even though I am a law and order girl by trade, I still had to root for dude here.
Outnumbered, no equipment… not even a shirt, my man bobbed and weaved and went right through them.
I’m not sure why my dude was up on that roof or what went down just before. Bad guy, misunderstood guy, confused guy, distraught guy: we don’t know which one he is.
What I do know is that he was committed to the proposition of not getting caught.
I feel like that a lot. Not running from the authorities, but just running. I’m always just a little bit anxious and said #anxiety, has led to a number of less than optimal decisions.
I hate conflict. I’m shy. And as a young person I thought Other People of any variety were problematic, distressing and intrusive. They didn’t even have to do anything to me either. Their presence in my airspace was disconcerting all on its own. I was always trying to be alone.
When I went to college I wanted to be an anesthesiologist. You know, a doctor who puts people asleep. Dream job. Unconscious is just how I liked people back in the day.
But in order to get into medical school you have to go to class in college… but once I figured out how to pass classes without going, I STAYED in my dorm room. Soaking up solitude and hanging with a few women friends who were gracious enough to put up with me. Got in and out with minimal effort and human contact. Something I regret to this day.
As a function of those bad decisions (and it’s fair to presume some less than stellar reasoning got my man up on that roof.) I, not unlike dude, found myself bobbing and weaving through a profession that, by its very nature, offered nothing but conflict and waves of people with whom you were paid to spar.
Then my reclusive behind married a dude with four kids. FOUR. What kind of self respecting wannabe recluse does that?
Poor decision making and a nervous nature notwithstanding things turned ok.
I hope whatever his issues, dude ends up okay too. Now as a law and order girl depending on what proceeded this scene ending up okay might require some jail time. You gotta pay to play.
Have a fabulous Friday. Stay nimble.
Should @wakeupwiththewolfshow @ryanfoxnow
One of my mother’s favorite expressions is #keepcoming.
Just shake out the sheets of your problems so you can see them all clearly then start working the edges.
Solve small if you have huge concerns, bite off bits and pieces of it till it’s a size you can consume or if you are unable to that, at least you’ve made it smaller so when it lands on you it doesn’t hurt as much.
Y’all have a great day!
#Life is full of phases. You start out in your own personal Matrix. We all get air dropped into this group of people who happen to be a certain way and live in a certain place and that becomes your normal.
Next thing you know those people who were your entire world ship you off to this big building with a bunch of other short people and you find out that not all families function similarly.
And that’s how it goes year after year. Your life expands in concentric circles …
as, it seems, do we.
At some point most of us are gonna have to add girth to our seating arrangement calculations.
#fail #fall #shoutout @fails
You ever just stumble on your own stupid? I mean, I haven’t said one right thing to any one body in days. #dogsofinstagram #dogs. I want to go on vacation but I don’t have anything to vacate. I mean I don’t do anything all day. Not true … but I don’t do anything that seems to go anywhere. I’m just kinda tumbling around the washing machine of a new and challenging existence. No complaints… just acknowledging the weirdness. Y’all have a good day. I’m gonna go play fetch.
You can’t play Uno with Monopoly rules.
Y’all know how I feel about finger wagging. They dragged #katemiddleton about the silence and the photoshopped picture. Had all these “well researched” theories replete with video evidence & clips of comments weaved together w/ such an exaggerated sense of their ability to suss out body language, explain royal protocol and accurately assess the human nature of a human whose true nature they knew nothing of and posit THE TRUTH. All the theories were extensively supported & completely wrong. She didn’t have plastic surgery, there was no impending divorce, no new chick.
I know I took a small inappropriately emotionally charged tangent. But the assumptions folk make. I’m not a royal watcher of fan but man, I can’t imagine.
My thing is we all have such limited perspectives. Even though we have computers and apps that give us access to all manner of other cultures we still see them through our own cultural kaleidoscope.
If I had kicked some guy in the face while dancing I would have apologized. If I got kicked at a party I would say something. But then again I wouldn’t be at that party.
It’s not for me. Wouldn’t know about it wouldn’t get invited to it, wouldn’t show if I did.
But apparently dude broke no rules. The guy on the receiving end responded in kind. And if you pay attention someone else who was also accustomed to the environment handed the guy who lost his drink another one.
I do a lot of odd stuff. I talk to myself while walking around the backyard. I mean, full throated conversations. But when you’re in a profession that demands large quantities of extemporaneous speaking, that chit chat in the grass facilitates ease of access to the right word when called upon.
Even though I think of that every time I get the urge to judge that about which I know little … I still end up invoking an inappropriate condemnation on occasion. 😞
The takeaway: You can’t check others w/out checking yourself first.
Relevant #Tolerism:
Be slow to judge people stuck on the side of a mountain you haven’t been required to climb.
Just because you know what someone’s done doesn’t mean they’ve only done what you know.
#love in the time of technology.
You gotta put the phone down to keep your #relationship together.
Shoutout @allfails
I murdered $45 worth of salmon just this morning.
I don’t know what was with dude in the yellow car. I could speculate but why?
Instead I will use the action as a metaphor for the futility of #worry and What Iffing. Life’s too liquid to make that kind of thing valuable. Who could have predicted that last part?
That’s the dumb thing about worry. So I’ve been trying to get out of the business of anticipating what’s next. I still plan and prepare but I’m fighting the urge to think too far past a point where a whole lot of possibilities intersect.
Three times this week I have run into some Spaghetti Junction-like kerfuffles. Typically that kind of thing would throw me into a washing machine of worry, just going around and around wet, worn out and spin cycle dizzy.
But I have a new rule. I get to consider no more than two of the most likely outcomes and I can only think about it for five minutes. I time myself on the phone stopwatch.
Then I go clean. After that I paint or crochet.
What that does is throw up borders around my worry. If I surround myself with things that are immediately achievable (a cleaner house) mixed with the acknowledgment that I have been granted a new day and a comfortable life that allows for no small measure of joy. (I both paint and crochet poorly but I enjoy them) I can contain racing thoughts better.
I am all about process and procedure. I work my #emotions like the job they are.
Black car did everything it could to avoid an accident but got rear ended by something he couldn’t anticipate.
We all need to be #emotionally prepared to deal w/ things that happen for which we aren’t.
That’s what my #podcast is going to be about. Ways to manage your #emotional terrain in a day and age where new weird and worrisome shows up in 5G all day. In the past when change was slower we had more time to adjust. Now … 😑
Live large
Love languidly
#Worry Less.
If you have questions you’d like me to answer on my podcast put them in my DMs.
I’m putting that out there so I’ll do it. I have yaaaaards of #lazy I have to get through. My lesser self does absolutely nothing with great aplomb.
What an unfortunate thing to be good at! 🤣🤣
Happy Thursday!
Don’t you hate it when they up and change the rules for no reason?
The feline was fine. Had his little companion and if he decided he didn’t want company (as cats are known to do) he could just walk off and the turtle couldn’t chase him down.
Now look at him.
Change is uncomfortable. Always ask yourself is ‘am I having a negative reaction to a bad idea or is the idea of change alone making me feel bad.
If I sit with any new irritation long enough I usually find out it’s the latter.
Shoutout @kusa.kame.gunso .gunso
#cats #catsofinstagram #change #rollin
You can TELL me to go home. You don’t have to make me wanna.
Obviously we are not witnessing an over the top break up but that’s the first thing that popped into my head when I saw it.
Too many years on Divorce Court, I think.
And of course we all hope they are both okay.
Happy Saturday!
Shoutout @graunogueto_
Happy Tuesday.
I was at my investment guys office and the whole floor went outside to watch the #eclipse.
It was an unexpected pleasure … a little not serious in the middle of serious.
And, of course, we hope she’s okay.
#bekind
#becareful
Watch the #periphery
#fails #falls. Shoutout @cdechavanne_
One ought not jump to conclusions about people.
Relevant #Tolerism: Just because you know what they’ve done doesn’t mean they’ve only done what you know.
Enjoy your #Friday!
Shoutout @jamesbrowndanceparty
I’m looking for whatever my dude has already found.
Almost go a hold of it yesterday! I was in my backyard with Zora, listening to #music. Me and Anita Baker were killing it. She let me take the two runs at the end of You Bring Me Joy. I got a standing O from the imaginary Peanut Gallery that lives in my head.
Then the phone rang.
I will try again today.
I always feel like I’m cheating you when I don’t have much to say.
That said …
Discretion being the better part of valor, some days demand a measure of silence.
Today is one of them.
I don’t need #peace to be still today. I need it to come find me. 😂😂😂😂
I know that’s not how it works … at all but one can always hope.
The trucks that can’t see the hold up must be wondering why.
After watching the whole thing and seeing that the back up goes in both directions now has me wondering why as well.
The whole video made me itch because I’m impatient and I hate inefficiencies.
That said I have to acknowledge what I don’t know and resist the urge to wax poetic about what I would have done.
I am just going to sit in the uncertainty of it and enjoy the visual and the song.
Happy Thursday!
Shoutout @dr.sosmedt
It’s a small thing. But it is one of my favorite parts about him: ‘I got it!’ That man handed me buckets of #peace … that is when he wasn’t working my last nerve. 😂 Stay together long enough and you get ample amounts of both.
Have a good day. Enjoy whatever imperfect partner you have. It’s so easy to focus on the crap they do that gets on your nerves. But don’t fill up your journal with that.
In general, we’re far more likely to fire off a missive about a mistake than to take the time to write about what went well.
But if you make a conscious effort to hang on to small sweet things it keeps you from collecting too many complaints because you’ve got so much good stuff written down there’s not enough room left to memorialize every little annoyance.
Love letters can be written without words. Send many … and read ALL the ones you get.
#familyfirst #family #familyisforever
Happy Saturday. Happy Easter too for all of you to whom it applies.
Shoutout @flexoffenderslist
I hope it jumps off well, all comes together all at once and stays that way all day.
They looked good, didn’t they?
Relevant #Tolerism
Under your skin is a sovereign country don’t go handing out passports all willy-nilly to people who don’t belong there.
You gotta make a decision early… whether you are gonna let you or that infamous, often inappropriately indignant, ubiquitous yet unidentified group known as THEY to decide how your day will go.
THEY get away with a lot of stuff because you don’t know who they are. On any particular day THEY could be a coworker, a relative, some fool in a Volvo driving too slow. I picked Volvo because that’s what I drive so no one needs to spiral out of control because I’ve insulted a whole class of car owners. Half the world out here pearl clutching for no reason … anyway …
The trick for me to maintain what ever crumbs of cool I manage to gather is to address the issue in the morning.
I wake up get coffee and assess the #emotional weather. If it’s cloudy I prepare for rain. Half hour on the treadmill with the right music gets me headed in the right direction.
If not I’m upset about something so I figure out what it is. And that’s when I start coordinating my day. I get a game plan to mitigate emotional upheaval.
My point? We’re all responsible for how we show up in this world. Lots of us take a lot time with our appearance hair clothes, before going out. These guys had to have worked a long time just to pull off this admittedly amazing ten second video.
All I ask is that we all spend some time getting our emotional houses in order so when we get out in the world and run into some unexpected turbulence, you got your seat belt on and you won’t go flying about the cabin.
#cool is a decision, followed by practice. The time not to get upset by SOMETHING is before you get upset about ANYTHING at all. You approach your day with your emotional raincoat buttoned up. That ways it’s easier for fools to roll right if your back.
No soaking in other people’s stupid. Typically they’re full of hot air so THEY float. Those not similarly afflicted, however, could drown. Shoutout @tonio1083
No one has it all. You get what you get then you have to decide how to play what you have.
When you’ve lost something important to you, you often spend a lot of time looking at the hole where it used to be.
Then you pop your head up one day and say, though I haven’t got THAT anymore look at all of THIS being around THAT gave me.
Sanguine on a #Sunday. #keepcoming
#emotionalintelligence Don’t be a #PickMe for your feelings. You decide. Regularly.
The only way to get good at something is to practice. Some things you can neither conquer nor control. You, however, should not be one of them.
I have spent my entire life wresting my peace back from the vicissitudes of this world. I was designed with a hair trigger limbic system and cascading, catastrophizing emotionality that allows just about any tale I write turn into a horror story.
But I work on it so it can’t keep working me.
If you’re naturally calm, I’m happy for you … a little jealous… but hey, I admit it.
But if you #worry like it’s an art form, don’t just sit in it. Fight to stay upright.
Not altogether sure how that video gave birth to a post on worry. But here we are.
Have a wonderful day.
Shoutout @shellyloux
#dogs #dogsofinstagram
This reminds me of me and BigE. I’d struggle. He’d tried to help. Then I’d kiss him.
Good #love lives on.
#happyeaster
Appears she had a tough day but she wasn’t gonna let it stop her. Headed home with a vengeance. I’ve been there.😂
I like this video because she kept coming and #keepcoming was my mother’s mantra. She preached toughness.
She wanted me to stand up for myself but didn’t want me to be delicate. Take #insult, for instance.
Her thing was you can’t let other people up end you if they aren’t authorized to do so.
Some people are. Your kids do it all the time. It’s their job. #momlife #dadduty
But the lady at the register? The guy that cut you off on the road? These people are, in accountancy terms, Disregarded Entities. They exist but they’re so powerless the government doesn’t even want to hear from them at tax time.
Also know as Pass Through Entities, all they can do is be a conduit. They can’t redirect anything.
That’s what all that noise is out there. People treating Disregarded Entities as purveyors of power. They are not.
And not for nothing I am nice to all the Disregarded Entities I meet. Not knowing anything about their corporate structure culture or current monetary health, you don’t want to rattle a cage that might actually fall on you.
Deeper still, what if you make that one kind comment that keeps them cool in a scorching hot day of inconvenience and irritations with the occasional indignity thrown in for good measure? What’s kindness gonna cost you? Even if they don’t respond well. As the old joke goes, when you get to Heaven God’s gonna ask you about your sins, not anybody else’s.
We’re all doomed to live in the agitation we create. Other people used to get on my nerves so bad I was never happy.
THEY were all fine. I was grouchy and discontented. I was the injured party, not them … and there is no wound so ignominious as one inflicted on oneself.
When met with new and odd ask yourself shall I judge or enjoy? Knowing that to them, YOU are a Disregarded Entity, why would you hand them your peace?
#keepcoming … like my girl here. Getting upset would not have gotten her any closer to her goal.
Let’s all be too tough to be taken down by someone else who’s trippin’.
Enjoy your day. #emotions #emotionalintelligence
Shoutout @failarmy
They were awfully calm about! That’s how I want to roll. Not into a roof .. but be able to roll calm should I happen to do so. #cool
I was talking to one of many workmen I’ve had of late …
As an aside, I think my house is mourning BigE too cause so many things simply just stopped working when he stopped being here. I mean in what world do you have to replace four toilets on the same day not long after the water heater burst and takes out a corner of the garage? And let’s not get into the air conditioner leaking through the ceiling and door handles breaking. House is 10 years old. I know it’s stupid but I think it’s him messing with me. Kinda like a voice from beyond saying ‘do you miss me yet?’
It makes me smile to think of it that way. I stick my tongue out at a picture of him every time something breaks.
One of the great things about our #marriage was we both shared the same sense of humor. To hell with the circumstances. He’s still mine and I can still rib him.
Now that you know faaaaar more about my household appliances than could ever interest anyone that’s not a repairman, back to the matter at hand. (lol I gotta scroll up because I can’t remember what I was talking about.)
Ok. I was extolling the virtues of cool. #becool …
Anyway one workman issues. He apologized profusely. I said, “You fixed it. That’s all I wanted.” He looked so relieved.
How am I gonna get mad. I make mistakes too.
Besides I used to think being an unforgiving Christian was an oxymoron. Now I think it’s heretical.
Relevant #Tolerisms
#Anger is an able imposter. It is usually no more than #fear or #frustration all dressed up in military garb IMPERSONATING #power.
With every epithet we hurl,
With every argument we get into,
we teach our children how to feel.
Gift your kiddies the ability to solve sanely and be peaceful in the face of folk who would seek to steal it from them.
In parting,I would like to wish the women who drove into a roof all the best.
Have a good day. Keep things in perspective. #emotionalintelligence
I’m not at all sure how he got there. Best guess #DoItFluid aka #alcohol.
But, again, I don’t know.
Whatever happened, the outcome was interesting.
I will say this for him though, he adopted the right attitude. Flailing about does not help when you’re stuck somewhere you don’t want to be without a discernible exit. You have to assess where you are and what you can do about it. You can’t just act on how you feel especially when panic is the result.
Yesterday I got that all wrong. I got upset by A and dragged my nervous system through the entire alphabet of potential catastrophes. I was out there just naming and claiming concerns. By the end of the day I was throwing emotional haymakers at everything. Just flailing away in the winds of worry. Wearing myself out as the world around me played emotional rope-a-dope.
I did not know that was what I was doing until I heard myself saying ‘if’ a lot.
I use everything at my disposal to help get through the day. I listen to the language I’m using. Often my choice of words will betray an #emotion I am sporting that is not what I need.
Too many ‘if’s’ and I know the #worry train has left the station. Once I realized that my fear chemicals were released, I understood that they were sauntering about in the recesses of my mind looking for potential problems upon which to throw fuel.
Next thing you know everything is an issue and I have lost an afternoon.
I am working my way out of this particular conundrum as we speak.
Relevant #Tolerism:
While you should never let the little girl in you die you just can’t let her run things.
Sometimes you just have to put your hands in your pockets and wait, even if you’re not currently comfortable where you are.
For the record, dude filming this said he was coming round to help. So let’s not go off on that tangent.
Have a great day! I’m going to, she says with great hope but a smidge less confidence.
#emotionalintelligence
Take your comfort where you can.
Sometimes you have to take a pause for the cause of your personal #peace. I don’t pause well at all. Being still is a struggle.
Gotta learn to put my peace in park when the road gets steep so that sucker doesn’t roll down the hill.
Sometimes progress is garnering the ability to be still and not let said stillness make you crazy. #emotionalintelligence
Shoutout @allfails @henrik_landas @bitch
